Have you ever done or said something you felt was stupid or awkward and just wanted to stop feeling that way? Have you ever disliked yourself enough to want to reinvent yourself? Maybe you thought “I’m going to be different. I don’t like myself, so I’m going to change myself.” Kids do this all the time. Some of them clam up after they have been embarrassed and just melt into the background. Some decide to change their outward appearance with clothing, hair color, look or weight. Some decide to change the way they act maybe trying to become funny or witty, goofy or what used to be called the class clown. There are kids who decide they are going to be perfect as in perfect grades or just be perfect by someone else’s definition.
Kids (and adults as well) can berate themselves that they didn’t say or do the right thing or that the right people don’t like them and they feel they are flawed. Actually, they were flawed before and that’s okay. In fact, it is the way things are. We all get into trouble when we compare our insides to someone else’s outside. What I have learned is that we all need to be true to ourselves whatever our unique self is. We get off track when we try to be someone we’re not.
I think this is about pain and feeling it. This is so hard to do. I just feel at loose ends when I am like this, just kind of down on myself and figuring out how to dissolve it. I know that if I wait a couple of days it will lift so that’s good, but I know that I need to be less hard on myself. Less judgmental and be able to move on. Does anyone judge you as harshly as you judge yourself? The Bible says “Judge not lest you be judged.” I think we can just stop at “Judge not.”